The best read that ive ever read about a Gemini......

The best read that ive ever read about a Gemini....and i am a living proof that it is absolutely true!!!!......ive even highlited the parts that i know are true.

GEMINI


The symbol for Gemini is meant to resemble their ruler, the Twins Castor and Pollux. Castor’s father was the king of Sparta, Tyndareus, and Pollux’ father was Zeus. The twins’ mother, Leda, was a bestiality slut who loved swans way too much. Castor died, Pollux got lonely but couldn’t technically die because he was half Greek God, and Zeus felt bad for him and let him rejoin his brother in the heavens. Can anybody say “co-dependent?” Who knows, maybe the twins were lovers…but wouldn’t that technically be masturbation?Gemini is ruled by Mercury, the planet of intellect and communication. You can usually spot one because they’re either talking way too fast or wearing much too many accessories.
That scene in Don Juan de Marco where Johnny Depp (also a Gemini) kisses that lady’s hands by working his way up from her fingertips to her knuckles to her… Oh damn! SO hot, and would melt any Gemini. Hand massages, wrist tickling, manicures, all big turn-ons for the twins. Even that creepy handshake-finger-palm trick makes the Twins blush a little. Both of them. However, if you really want to leave a lasting impression in their underwear, you have to tickle their… most private… most intimate…most throbbing and fatigued muscle… their minds. That’s right, nothing is better for a Gemini than good, stimulating conversation. It’s not even a matter of talking dirty, you have to talk dirty with style and wit. There’s a trick to it. After all, every Gemini enjoys a good mind-fuck (no boys, don’t try to stick it in their ear… that’s just gross).

Famous Gemini hotties include Judy Garland, Marilyn Monroe, Bob Dylan, Melissa Etheridge, Bob Hope, John F. Kennedy, Nicole Kidman, Angelina Jolie, Morrissey, Anne Heche, Miles Davis, Mike Myers, Allen Ginsberg, Sandra Bernhard, Prince, Tom Jones, Boy George, Natalie Portman, Elizabeth Hurley, Kylie Minogue, Gene Wilder, and of course, Michelle and me! Noticing a trend? Yes, everyone on the list is either bisexual, a queer icon, or at least has had some sort of incident where they were hit on in some locker room by someone of the same sex when they were in high school. Why you ask? I think it’s because Geminis are so open-minded, and also as mentioned earlier, they accessorize so well. No, the real truth of the matter is that Geminis are flirts and talkative, and will engage anybody with their stylish use of words themselves. These people can be bisexual, bicoastal, bilingual, and can have mood swings biweekly. They need two of everything, and can be double the trouble.
Rumor has it that Geminis can even be two-faced and hypocritical, but in my experience, the duality of Gemini is expressed in their two very distinct moods. They can be divided by intense introversion and extroversion, happy-go-lucky spontaneous natures and methodical anal-retentiveness, or simply their bipolar personality of extreme depression and darkness followed by their elation and effervescent laughter and sense of humor. Unfortunately, they also change their minds easily, and can be all about someone one day, and then totally over them the next. And when the door to the Gemini’s heart is shut that usually means it’s over forever. They rarely look back because they’re too fixated on going forward faster, while doing two things at once. That’s just how their mind works, always concentrating on what they’re about to say and not what they’re actually saying in the moment they say it… which can get them into trouble. But unlike their polar opposite, the Sagittarius, they can usually charm their way out of anything they accidentally let slip. Unlike their Taurus neighbors on the astrological chart, devotion in a love relationship is not an ethos many Geminis subscribe to, unless you find a way to really, and I mean REALLY, earn it.
Now for what we’ve all been waiting for…

Gemini and Gemini
If these two (shall I say four) ever find a moment to shut up, then they’re usually having sex. However, you can be in the room with them, and not even notice that they’re having sex, because they could be disguising the fact that they’re having sex by pretending to be talking about some profound world issue, or musician, but be aware, they’re not conversing. Its foreplay, and you’re a voyeur caught in their sick little game, and you should look away soon because he’s about to stick it in! It’s almost like the twins in The Dreamers. They were twins, but also definitely Geminis (look at their trivia fixation and mind games… so typical). The Olsen twins are Geminis too… ahhhh…. naughty thoughts…..

Gemini and Cancer
It’s like that song in Heathers, “Teenage Suicide… DON’T DO IT!” Well, you can do it for a while until the whiney “I just want to stay home and cuddle” nature of the Cancer drives Gemini’s “I just want to go out and party” nature up the freaking wall! Plus, Gemini has very little patience and wants instant communication, but Cancer usually takes a little while to figure out how they’re going to phrase things so as not to hurt anyone. By the time Cancer figures out what they wanted to say and how they wanted to say it, Gemini is onto someone else.

Gemini and Leo
Um, it works all the time. Gemini is a smooth talker and Leo loves hearing great things about him or her self. Leo also wants a harem of groupies, and Gemini is often so many people in one person that the groupie wagon is nicely rolled into one person… the Gemini. Gemini will also masterfully know when to say things to Leo like, “You’re so brilliant,” or “You’re so hot,” or “You’re so big!” Leo will be loyal forever to someone they consider that honest and observant.

Gemini and Virgo
These two share a ruling planet, Mercury, and will communicate pretty well. Not many can stand what some read from Virgo as frigidity, but Gemini dissolves that quickly because Virgo and Gemini will communicate thoroughly through any issue. Also, Virgo will appreciate Gemini’s wordy explanation and logic on why they have to have sex as often as possible. Virgos love logic and Geminis love getting into someone’s pants! They’ll probably use big words in phrases in bed like “Oh baby, your blandishments makes me want to accrete with you so hard…”

Gemini and Libra
Libras and Geminis are so civilized around each other. They can be best friends and true lovers; however, when Libra gets all sarcastic, and Gemini matches their tone, Libra will get all hurt and resentful because they can’t take what they dish out. Gemini will have to make it up to them by writing them a love poem or an intense email or text message, and then all will be well in the world. Also, Libras like to feel like they are making love and that their lives are rich with romance, and Gemini is creative enough to keep that spirit alive.

Gemini and Scorpio
This combination happens A LOT. I don’t really know why, but it does. Geminis are magnetically drawn to Scorpio’s energy. Scorpio is attracted to Gemini because Scorpio loves mysteries and they want to solve the mysterious layers of Gemini’s personality to finally figure Gemini out (an impossible task). Also, they are pretty bound by the amount of sex they have. Scorpio also allows Gemini the freedom of exploration and perversity as long as their relationship has a healthy amount of trust and commitment (just think Dan and Rosanne).

Gemini and Sagittarius
When these two fight (and they will because they’re polar opposites) they will immediately resolve the fight with sex. Randy, jovial sex that seems almost like an Olympic sport. These two experiment and laugh a lot, and are always down to travel the globe and have sex in as many places on Earth (or in public) as possible.

Gemini and Capricorn
*Sigh* In my experience, this combination happens a lot too, but when it doesn’t work out, it’s usually because Capricorn gets frustrated with Gemini because they don’t take Gemini seriously enough. These two rarely, if ever, fight. They’ll resolve their disagreements, but never actually fight. Gemini can be drawn to Capricorn’s gloomy and earthy nature, and Capricorn can admire Gemini’s intellect and diplomacy. Sometimes, Capricorns get paranoid that Gemini is making fun of them, and nothing makes a Capricorn angrier than being made fun of or being made into the fool. At their core Capricorn is a very serious and formal creature.

Gemini and Aquarius
Great friends and a very kinky pair. Gemini might get frustrated sometimes because only Aquarius can beat Gemini in the disconnected nature and intimacy issues department. However, once they work through that (which they have a good chance of doing) they will be first in line for a bondage night or whipped cream fight. These two love to play with the master-slave dynamic (Gemini because it appeals to their playfulness, and Aquarius because it appeals to their slavery and subservience issues). These two can watch Secretary over and over and over again, and find it as wholesome as apple pie.

Gemini and Pisces
They might find the same problems as the Gemini/Cancer combination, but they have a bit more in common since they’re both mutable signs. If Gemini can stand Pisces’ self-defeating fear and lack of ambition or if Pisces can stand Gemini’s impatience and occasional cruelty, then they have a chance. Pisces just has to shut up sometimes and be slapped around to have a good time. Gemini will be the first in class to raise their hand for that assignment.